We worry about the people we love. We share our wisdom, sometimes even in lecture form. If that fails, we make rules. We do everything we can to help our child, our brother, our spouse, our friend. In the end our loved ones make their own decisions. We cannot make another person choose wisely. Even though we see the pit yawning ahead, we cannot force another person to turn aside. That’s tough, because we’re left to watch the disaster happen.
What does our faith have to say to us when we feel powerless to save or rescue our loved ones? In her book of daily reflections, Glimpses of Grace, Madeline L’Engle offers this advice: “Our job is to take care of the possible and trust God with the impossible.”
I applied this principle to a concern I have with a friend. During my prayer time, I said to God, “Okay, I’m to take care of the possible. What is possible for me in this situation? What can I do for this person?
The answer came immediately. “Love him. You can love him.”
“Of course I can love him,” I responded. “I have loved him since the day he was born. Even today when he is making choices that will bring him pain, I love him. That’s easy, but, my love won’t force him to make good choices.”
Therefore, I applied the second part of Madeline L’Engle’s advice. “Trust God with the impossible.” Of course, I thought. I’ll give him to God. Jesus said, “I will be with you always, even unto the end of time.” (Matthew 28: 20) When I trust God with the impossible, I must let go of my need to bring about my friend’s transformation. God and he will figure it out. And whatever happens I can trust that he is God’s precious child, and God will never abandon him.
Following this principle is a struggle, but when I do, I find peace for my soul.
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